Now the first thing you notice about Jessica is her stature, small petite whatever you want to call it. She more closely resembles an elf then a human, small and delicate but carrying with the fragility an almost contradictory intensity and solidarity of character. I consider her a philosophical opposite as I consider my self bound to logic and rational, driving down definitions and using a set of premises and axioms to state and manipulate my argument. Jessica on the other hand feels out a problem allowing it to remain fluid and ambiguous. The friction generated between our two opposing views meeting makes for heated but entertaining conversations.

“So Lawrence I have been thinking and I have an idea I wanted to bounce off you.” Jessica started.

“Oh yea and what's that?” This should be good I thought to myself.

“Well I have been reading some different philosophies on and about human behavior in particular male human behavior, One I like and think works is ,kill it or fuck it, the basis of the philosophy is that all male behavior can be explained by applying these two instincts in abstract ways.”

She looked at me with an intense gaze of conviction to this idea. I didn't know what to think as a man I questioned myself. Is this how I view situations?

“Kill it or fuck it, huh what an interesting concept, you really think all male behavior can be derived out of these two primal instincts?” My smiled widened; I was shocked and intrigued by this concept.

“Why not? Look at how men view situations, they either kill it, you know beat it completely or just say fuck it and ignore it,” She explained.

“I don't think I quite understand what you are getting at. It never occurred to me that I am killing and fucking all the different situations I encounter.”

“Think more abstractly; take for example school you do it because it needs to get done right? You have some preset destination in mind, some end goal you hope to reach. So you are killing the situation, conquering it and giving yourself power over it. Or you can just fuck it and not even worry about it, people are lazy haven't you noticed?”

“I will give you that, laziness is a problem in society. But Jessi I don't think I kill school though, this notion of killing I am not agreeable with, it implies some threat. Well actually in an abstract sense I can see a threat, say if by choosing not to participate in school it would threaten a number of things mostly potential like my future.”

“It's more like killing in the since of completion, look at hunter instincts you have to kill an animal before you can eat it and reap the benefits of it. Same idea as school you have to kill it in order to reap the benefits of school. The big difference is life is black and white its either alive or dead, with school its more in the grey as there aren't any defined conditions of killing school well actually come to think of it graduation might fit that description. See what I mean?”

“I guess so I just never thought about it in that context, I always thought my motives were more pure then killing or fucking, but on some primal level I feel I can identify with such instincts.”

“Think about it for a while..”

“Ok so Jessica if men are driven by the instinctual desires to kill or fuck things, this raises the question what are women driven by?”

“Well I think women are bound by a …”

“Oh I know love it and hug it.” I interrupted; she glared at me for the unnecessary outburst.

“Women are more complex then kill it or fuck it there are a lot of different motivations behind a her actions.” She started again.

“Is that so? Are you telling me girls never kill or fuck things? I have seen plenty of girls commit actions out of pure animosity. So like I kill school what do you do to school? ”

“I don't think women are excluded altogether, I am just implying there is more behind her actions then killing it or fucking it.”

“So what would you say if men are kill it and fuck it, women are…..?”

“Like I said its more complex then that,”

“Oh is it, I think I have figured it out men are kill it and fuck it, women are just a question mark.”

She stonewalled me with disagreement, not taking particular notice to my pokes of sarcasm. Although our conversation ended I continued thinking about the weird notion Jessica brought up. I still to this day find it a rather abstract but far reaching idea to explain away the actions of me and my male counterparts.